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Lorraina Parsons

About me, that’s hard to define. Hmmm, well, I haven’t really gotten to ever decide who I am, I don’t think. I have been told what to do and how to think and been dictated to, ever since I was 15 years old by Utopia. Before that, I was a kid and didn’t really think about it, and maybe my parents just sort of decided for me, what I would do and stuff. I mean, I guess now that I’m thinking about it, I do have likes and dislikes, and I do have beliefs that differ from what I was told to believe. So, maybe that is at least part of who I am, or about me. But I guess, I just never took the time to think about it before. Who “defines” themselves?  I mean maybe people do, but I don’t know, I just never thought about it.

So, ok, I guess if I am just telling my likes and dislikes, then here goes. I like pizza, pancakes, popcorn, ok well those all start with the letter P, so that was not on purpose, haha! Ok, so, I love getting my nails done, I enjoy the sky and watching the clouds and stars, I often look up and think about everything up there, and feel like there is so much more out there. Why are we stuck in this little confined prison they call “Utopia”, or “Life”, or why have we been? What is the purpose of it all? Why did they take us from our parents? Who gave them the right to ruin all of our lives? Where are my parents? What happened to my siblings? Do they even remember me? Do they care? Are they even looking for me? Did they give up? Do I have a chance? Can anything I do even make a difference?

Well, that is a lot of questions, but some of these questions explain what I am thinking and feeling. I guess they are a part of who I am. I am still becoming, I am NOT made yet. I am NOT Static, I am Dynamic. I learned about that once in an English class before coming to this lousy school in the Utopia program. I also learned piano at home, but haven’t gotten to play since they took me away from my parents. Oh what I wouldn’t give to play the piano again and to see my family! I guess I don’t know who I am. I’m still searching and finding that out. For now, I will say, that I am full of questions, hope, persistence, love of my long lost family, plans, dreams, belief that something better is out there and I will find it, hopefully soon.